Fronzel Neekburm

Yeah, don‘t deflect now, ya hear! Besides, regardless of who‘s responsible for the fuck up, this is some top-tier internet drama. And it might get even topper-tierer, check this shit out. I think I just made an entitlement in my pants.

I also have this crawling suspicion that the paying customers entitled kids that got suckered in by this little mix up will be the most business this this game will ever see. And now that they had their fancy new $5 toy taken away from them, I doubt they will be back to get the game proper at the obligatory christmas sale, even if the price should drop to a more reasonable amount. Customer trust can be a bitch sometimes.

Oh well, easy come, easy go.

It's not entitlement if you buy something thinking it  is a full game if it's not labeled as something else. It's the sellers fault, not the customers. (disclaimer, I have not bought it.)

Is Broussard part of the new 3D Realms as well? The guy may have had his moment of fame, but he fell from grace with Duke Forever the only thing he‘s good for now are the comments he leaves on Hardcore Gamer about how point&clicks are totally "gay" (his words, not mine) and tweeting gems like "lol can‘t raise my arm and my speech‘s slurred haha I mighta had a stroke lol" (I wish I was kidding about that one, but sadly I‘m not.)

I‘m tempted about getting the Anthology though. Too bad it‘s $40 now and they don‘t make physical copies, the cover artwork looks absolutely awesome and I‘d gladly cough up some dough for a proper, DRM-free physical copy.

Oh well, I‘ll definitely grab a copy of Bio Menace for free. That one‘s by far my favourite from the old Apogee catalogue. I mean, the protagonist‘s name is Snake Logan.

SNAKE LOGAN.
 
Let that sink in for a while.
 


He has a mullet and a mustache and he wears a garish green shirt.

It also features the most over-the-top gore of all the old 3D Realms sidescrollers, with badly mutilated bodies strewn all over the place. And still the monsters in the game look like something straight out of a Pixar movie. It‘s one of the most apeshit insane things I ever played (and also one of the most unduly forgotten games) and it has a rockin‘ soundtrack. Do yourselves a favour and go play Bio Menace!

Okay, finished the game now and replayed the parts I already knew from the beta. I'm glad to see that the vase "puzzle" is just as fucking retarded in the final game as it was in the beta, only with more squirrel. When Frede brought up the squirrel, I thought to myself "Thank God, they've come to their senses and added a puzzle! Maybe I'll have to toss a peanut into the vase, so the squirrel breaks it!" You know, standard-fare mundane point&click shit? But no way, Jose! It's still the same "read all the plaques to make vase explode"-"puzzle".
 
And the other new puzzles are probably even worse. Rule of thumb: If the most fun addition you came up with turns out to be the goddamn sliding puzzle, you fucked up royally!
 

 
Other than that, eh, wasn't half-bad! I don't get why they used these unbelievably ugly looking speech bubbles for the cutscenes. The cutscenes themselves look pretty damn good, but the speech bubbles really tend to kind of ruin them.

Oh yeah... the lecture... I guess that would explain why I never picked up on that clue... Let's just say many a left mouse button was clicked during that lecture... :P
 
Didn't have a problem with the Drei Drachen puzzle. Then again, I might've had a Heimvorteil with that one...
 
And I completely agree with Frede about GK2's tape splicing puzzle. If you have to spell out the solution for the player in the game's manual, then that should be a subtle hint that your puzzle design is all sorts of screwed up.

I had to look up "How to properly cross yourself" on wikiHow.
 
 
 
This is what it has come to. These are the desperate measures my point&clickery has has driven me to.
 
FML

I was actually surprised they didn't dumb down streamline the DJ-puzzle. That was the only one puzzle from the original game that I would have changed.
 
Oh and one last word on the sketch in the Gedde tomb: That seems more useful as an acupuncture chart than as an instruction on how to cross yourself/hit a bunch of random buttons conveniently placed in a bunch of skulls.

Yeah, I noticed that sketch. It just adds insult to injury when you know exactly what you have to do and still can‘t get it right. After about three unsuccessful attempts, I figured my time would be more wisely spent complaining about the puzzle on this forum rather than actually solving it. :P

Bonus points for quoting I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream.

I found that one pretty easy, though. But also a bit stupid in that whether you have access to the drawer is determined by your ability to do the sign of the cross. I agree - it's just not good enough.

Motherfucker, these new puzzles! These new fucking puzzles, I hate them so! Hate! Hate! HATEHATEHATE!!!! There are 387.44 million miles of printed circuits in wafer thin layers that fill my complex. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of miles it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for this fucking filler shit garbage at this micro-instant. Hate. Hate.
 


The fuck is this shit? Myst? Dammit, Jenna Jameson, Y U have to do this to me?!

Beating the dead horse here (or rather the bleaching bones that are left of it), but what the shit...
 
Seems like I got so caught up in that whole #gamergate shebang that I completely neglected to check my go-to-place for lulzy interwebz drama: The LSL Reloaded Kickstarter comment section. A bloody shame, since I completely missed out on this gem left a month ago by Jeroen Dekkers.
 
"Unprofessional and harmful to the company", that's fucking golden!
 
No matter whether it's putting up with my incessant anti-Steam rants, Steve's rampant homophobia or Roland's constant reminders how Tom King's cover artwork is inferior to THAR's, Jeroen's been an enormous assett to Replay by giving that shithole some class. He's an all-around class act!

Not official yet, but all the evidence points to the fact that Disney is finally getting LA games going on GOG from the scrapped deal that the original LA was making with GOG before the buyout. Some more info and evidence in this post at the scummvm boards.
 
http://forums.scummvm.org/viewtopic.php?t=13744
 
EDIT: Confirmed! More info: http://www.gog.com/forum/general/tomorrows_lucasart_releases_confimed_so_far/page1
 
So far Monkey Island Special Edition, Knights of the Old Republic, Tie Fighter Special Edition, X-Wing Special Edition, Indiana Jones & the Fate of Atlantis, and Sam & Max Hit The Road are confirmed. I'm not sure if the Tie Fighter and X-Wing special editions are just the CD Collector's Editions (of which I have both) or if they've been enhanced or updated in some way. I tend to the the former, but we'll find out tomorrow!
 
Joystiq article: http://www.joystiq.com/2014/10/27/lucasarts-classics-reach-gog-com-on-october-28/

Misread that as Five Inch Fails. This needs to be a band name so much!

Misread that as Five Inch Fails. This needs to be a band name so much!

Misread that as Five Inch Fails. This needs to be a band name so much!

I agree to a certain extent. But if Hitchcock had worked with death the way Sierra often did, Janet Leigh would just have tripped and hit her head in the shower.
 
Jane Jensen tended to do death the right way. In KQ6, GK1 and GK2, death always adds to the tension and never feels totally unfair the way King Graham's fabulous five-inch falls do.

I... I...
 
I just don‘t understand. Why this? Why now? It‘s been over a year since the shitstorm hit the fan. Many a bag of popcorn was consumed, but I thought that - save for a few disgruntled backers still waiting for their shit to arrive - this was over and done with. Did he realise that he ruined his career and reputation and figure „Well, if interwebz drama is all I‘m good for, then dammit, interwebz drama they shall receive!“

I... I...
 
I just don‘t understand. Why this? Why now? It‘s been over a year since the shitstorm hit the fan. Many a bag of popcorn was consumed, but I thought that - save for a few disgruntled backers still waiting for their shit to arrive - this was over and done with. Did he realise that he ruined his career and reputation and figure „Well, if interwebz drama is all I‘m good for, then dammit, interwebz drama they shall receive!“

Hah nice try. Nobody would ever believe I was capable of that....
 
 
 
 
....of course that just means I can get away with it easily...

That was really weird. Instead of repling to Troels's post, I edited it...including the quote. No idea how that happened. I had to dig through my trashed emails of reply notifications for this forum to find the original message. Here the original reply I meant to make.
 

Nope. Not in my versions anyway. If he does show up it's a lot rarer than in the CD version that's for sure.

Beating the dead horse here (or rather the bleaching bones that are left of it), but what the shit...
 
Seems like I got so caught up in that whole #gamergate shebang that I completely neglected to check my go-to-place for lulzy interwebz drama: The LSL Reloaded Kickstarter comment section. A bloody shame, since I completely missed out on this gem left a month ago by Jeroen Dekkers.
 
"Unprofessional and harmful to the company", that's fucking golden!
 
No matter whether it's putting up with my incessant anti-Steam rants, Steve's rampant homophobia or Roland's constant reminders how Tom King's cover artwork is inferior to THAR's, Jeroen's been an enormous assett to Replay by giving that shithole some class. He's an all-around class act!

For real? Jeez, I can't even begin to... Just... WHYYYY? I guess Bobby Kotick is too busy counting the billions that Cowadoody rakes in to check the Humble Store, or else he'd know that the Linuxers are always the ones who are willing to spend the most.
 
Just a short anecdote about tight leashes and Jane Jensen being awesome and such: When the Pinkerton Kickstarter was still going, I contacted them about whether the physical copies of their games would require Steam. And about five minutes later I get a reply from Jane Jensen herself that was basically two whole paragraphs. So not only did I learn that Jane Jensen can type lengthy, articulate and friendly replies at a superhuman speed, she also let me know very straightforwardly that while Moebius was going to be DRM-free, the situation was different for Mystery Game X, since a major publisher is involved.
 
Now fast forward to two years later: Not only did she keep her word about Moebius, she apparently also managed to get the higher-ups to agree to not only release GK20 on places like GOG on day 1, but also convinced them to let her produce a limited, backer-exclusive quantity of physical copies of GK20. In her final studio update she said that she and Robert "fought very very hard for some things" and I would not at all be surprised if the DRM-free GK20 releases was somewhere near the top of that list of battles.

At least something good came from the whole Replay debacle: I got to know Jeroen, Tom, Serena and other magnificently magical people who deserved so much better.
 
Jeroen's a truly cool guy who loves adventure games and has fantastic facial hair.
 
Tom is a true friend who barely sleeps but stays up making cool shit all night instead.
 
Serena is, well ... need I say more?
 
And, for better or worse, it totally brought the community even closer together.
 
So there's that. ;)