Jump to content


  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

About petroleumjelliffe

  • Rank
    Mop Jockey
  1. I’m starting a podcast where I interview baristas, who are trying to make it as stand-ups. It’s called “Comedians… https://t.co/RTr2QkwQyY

  2. RT @sapinker: I collect ambiguous headlines. This one, on our President's health, is among the best. https://t.co/G6YTMc9hNM

  3. RT @AdrienneLaF: "Babies are listening, and you should treat them as conversational partners." https://t.co/ST7HIMAWW0

  4. 5 years ago, my story about a coworker always saying “rapport” with an extra “pa” was retweeted by Michael Rapapaport.

  5. For my next trick, I’ll generate fake gossip about these fake celebs https://t.co/SYiWHZVKD2

  6. ✅ Riots ✅ Fire ✅ Flood ✅ Earthquake ✅ Hurricane 🔲 Monster... https://t.co/kG16oRgbRw

  7. RT @DeniseDSLu: ok also, this was hands down the best thing I found on NASA's eclipse site during my research https://t.co/hkvSdAEcRK

  8. Death by a thousand cooks in the kitchen #mixedmetaphortmanteau

  9. @tipsy_ruminant @ohhleary Let's go Mets!

  10. I'm switching to smear-on sunscreen https://t.co/wr9HErbxzR https://t.co/XVFewwVctm

  11. Google released an AI plays 5-year old niece/nephew piano accompaniment https://t.co/Bh7xrtSLYv

  12. RT @adrjeffries: I wrote about my frustrations with the incredibly musty and sometimes casually racist NYT crossword puzzle: https://t.co/i…

  13. Nice, @SlackHQ used the fake American baseball player names from #toddbonzalez #bobsondugnutt… https://t.co/vzS0SFhFS9

  14. RT @odannyboy: There really is a Trump tweet for everything. It’s like he went to the future then back to warn us about himself. https://t.…

  15. Why would you ever make a #marchmadness commercial that relies on a voiceover, when 95% of TVs showing it are muted?