Sledgy Posted January 13, 2009 Report Share Posted January 13, 2009 Put jokes here about Space Quest. *** * It's my badass remake of Akril comics ) * * * * * * * * * http://jift.narod.ru/invis/emoquest.jpg * http://jift.narod.ru/invis/punk_sq.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted June 30, 2010 Author Report Share Posted June 30, 2010 Sori for mai Englis :D Anecdotes *** (SQ1) Roger has gone away from his closet and looks to the sides of the corridor - everybody lies on the floor: - Geez, it was really cool party!!! *** (SQ3) Two Guys from Andromeda (TG): Oh thanks, Roger, you saved us!!! Elmo (E): You're wrong!!!!! Ahahaha!!! TG: O_O Roger ®: Yep, not at all, guys. I think such superhero as me couldn't do otherwise! So, I must to present myself... My name is... E: Hey!!!! R: Roger Wilco!!!! And, yeah-yeah, I'm a janitor and all. But no matter!!! Important that I'm a Champion Wrestling and I can see the danger in the right time... E: CATCH THEM!!!! R: And, you know, I have also many valuable qualities. Let us say, I wear only clean clothes. And yet I have yellow hairs. That's cool, you know what I mean? The ScumSoft guard surrounded them. Two Guys from Andromeda shake with fear embracing each other. R: Ha! But it's a rubbish. If only you saw how I walk. Did you see how I walk? I got the great military gait!!! This can't be so easy to explore! I'm almost as professional... E: Somebody, shut up him yet... *** SQ1. The sphere spider droid pursues Roger. - Nooo, don't kill meee!!! - Roger bawls jumping from shots. Spider talks with robot voice: - Whhhyy??? - I'm not tasty!!!! - Roger throws various food to spider, - Here, catch this yummy!!! Spider: - Crunch. Crunch. Thanks... - I WAS SAVED??? - Rog smiles. - You are dessert!!! *** SQ5. Roger enters in his new ship. - I'm your captain!!! - he says and proudly looks at his team. No attention. - Erh... I'm... erh... a captain!.. - they don't care, - ME-EAT!!!!!! Droole: - Shut up!!! *** - Exchange it to 30 buckozoids, - Roger says confidently putting 2 buckozoids in the slot machine. *** SQ1. In the Sarien ship. Roger dressed to Sarien. - Stand up! - guardian came up to him. - What, where? - Wilco with trembling hands strokes his gun in the pocket. - What's your name? I never saw you!!! - Erh... I'm newbie. Sarien Wilco! - Hm... Well, now remove the helmet. - No. - WHY NOT??? - Erh... We drunk yesterday, I got very yellow swollen face... - Aah... Me too :D Well then, go away... *** SQ4. - Father, we must run! We'll save you!!! - Father? - Hurry up, we'll send you into the SQ12!!! - What? - Come on, why're you so slow!!!!!! From the bar Roger goes out with SPs. Rebels look at him, and then at man with whom they talked. Sequel-cop: - You rock... *** Meeting with Vohaul in the end of SQ4. Roger pulls son out from strange beaming. - Phew, sonny, are you ok? - Yes, but I'm Vohaul!!! - How's that? - Look here... - and son begins to break-dance, to twist on the floor, to flip. - ??? - Well in short, your son couldn't do so!!!! - Aaah... Well run fast away, else Vohaul can probably go back.... - You are so stuupid, - son laughs, - I AM VOHAUL!!!! - Ok-ok, run, sonny, hurry up!!! All this'll blow up now!!! - Really??? - son has big eyes, - Run, papa, RUUUUN!!!!!! *** Last scene in the SQ4, father and son. Son show the foto of Wilco's future wife. - Hell no, she is some ugly, - Roger scratches head, - Can I see all other? *** Scott and Mark were fired from Sierra. Scott (S): Well, Mark, it's G-time. M: You mean... S: Yes. GUUUUYVERRR!!!! M: TRANSFOOOORMATIION!!!! S: Let's kick them ass!!! *** - We're Two Guys from Andromeda! - And I'm One Man from Massachusetts!!! *** Stellar want to talk Roger about her love to him: - Erh... You know... erh... - What? - Roger washes the floor in the DeepShip 86. - S... so-o... erhh... Are you believe in... Roger diligently washes the floor. - In... - Stellar blurts, - IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT!!!!! Roger stops: - You love me?! She is happy: - Y-yes!!! He throws mop to her: - Well then, wash this floor!!!!! *** Roger draws some nonsense scrawl in the paper. And suddenly Kielbasa comes up here... And he looks at Roger's drawings.... - Hmmm, Wilco, - he says, - You know, psychologists says.... if man draw some garbage... - commander tall looks at Wilco, - he... what? - But it's not garbage, it's you, sir! - Rog smiles. - That's it, I'm exactly talking about this, that if... WHAT???? Wilco nervous swallowed and comes back to exit. - I... I mean... - Let me that here!!!! - Kielbasa takes his drawing away, - Hmm... There must be taily... Hm, where're my wonderful eyes here?.. Well-well, and this mane... - he draws, - and... yeah-yeah, my fabulous teeth!!!! GREAT!!!!! - he gives Roger the drawing, - Learn while you're just a... nothing! Wilco looks at the drawing: Roger: - Y-y-yeah.... That's a ... masterpiece, commander!.. - Hell yeah. - Kielbasa goes away. *** (from right to the left) - Damn... did we demolish his head? - But I think it was. *** *** Radiation Quest 1 VGA *** Droole shoved Roger from the captain chair and pulled out a pistol: - Now I'm an owner of ship!!! Obey me!!! I'll rule this garbage ship!!! Ah-ha-ha-ha!!!!! Ship is attacked by mutants. Everywhere alarm beeps, althing is collapsing, breaking, engines fail... Droole sits again on his place: - E-erh... Captain Wilco, will orders? *** Option as "buckozoid" came up - during a quarrel: - You're some buckozoid!!! - AND YOU'RE PUCKOID!!!! - That bastard, rush him!!!!! *** HINTBOOK - And where're action icons in the SQ3???!!! It's such stupid game, where you need just WALK???? Yes. It's walking game. - Tell me, how to finish SQ5 without solution? Easy. - How? With solution. - What? Can you explain it??? No. - How to turn on the text parser input in the SQ5? I can't type "look", "stand" and all these things!!! You've bad-quality version, throw PC up. - How to finish SQ8? Where do I can download solution???? I had it somewhere here, wait a second... Hm, seems, you was cheated, it's SQ0. - no, it's SQ8!!!! I'm sure!!!!! Probably it's SQ6. - NO!!!! IT'S EXACTLY SQ8!!!!! ...Hm. Are you talking about Space Quest? - What? Sister Queen VIII. My favourite game!!! Ah yep. GET OUT HERE, YOU DUMB!!! - Why're EGA games so prim? Pri... what? - I mean, they suck. I played in 1, 4, 5 chapters. It's ok in there, and here some shitable versions are - these 2, 3, 0 ... WHY???? And why not? - Why do this hintbook so suck??? I paid 600 bucks for this??!!!! Hell yeah. Shut up. *** Why So SpaceQuestious? *** Roger'll get you!!! * - Go away from my nest! * Wife is the responsibility. Damn, which should I choose? * Very old Space Quest "I'm Roger. Manipulate me via typing commands" * http://jift.narod.ru/invis/rw_nude.PNG And don't YOU fear be some nude? * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/matrix_shoot.PNG * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/sq1v_iconbar_face.PNG * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/humor_kruto.PNG - That's cool!!! - yeeaah awesome!!! * Roger like hot cakes. http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/humor_roger.PNG * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/humor_s.PNG - YEEEEEAHHHAAAA!!!! * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/humor_sq3_rus.png Enter input: - kill salesman * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/humor_sq3_troe.PNG - Damn... Who is Roger of them? * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/humor_Ternox_joke.jpg ARE YOU ENROLLED IN THE ACADEMY STARCON? * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/joke_sq1v.PNG - Ooh yeah, man... * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/joke_sq5_intro.PNG "Again it was bad fixed..." * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/joke_twoguys_ring.jpeg * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/Festerblatz_prik.jpg * Matrix setting http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/Neo_Wilco.jpg http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/SQ_Matrix.jpg * Roger Chapaev http://s59.radikal.ru/i166/1006/4d/25c8e86d1687.jpg * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/Prognoz.jpg * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/SP_Joke.JPG - Are you sure it's that coordinates? * http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/Payback_Joke.GIF Revenge Time!!! * South Park style http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/South_Roger.jpg http://spacequest-time.narod.ru/files/South_Vohaul.gif Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted September 12, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2010 Rog Hitman * Beginning of SQ6 "What, I'm fired?! BUT I SAVED YOUR *SSES FROM THE MUTANTS!!!!1111" * SQ6. After firing. "What're you looking at?" * (anime DeathNote) I NEED REMOVE GARBAGE FROM THE GALAXY!!! "I feel bad..." "nooo!!! but I was in the game which even didn't released!!!!" * Сontinuation of DeathNote topic... - Hello, I'm Roger Wilco. I'm here to stop YOU!!! - Hm, Wilco spells as w-i-l-c-o, right? - Yes, but why're you asking me, Light?.. (...) Aghhh!! * "We must find this bandit! He always kill bandits! He... is a bandit!!!" - StarCon officers yell. Letter V appears in the display screen: "Today another one will die!!!!" "Damn! What'll we do?" Roger enters in the room eating chocolates: "It's Quirk. I'm sure by 5%!" Quirk dies. "Now by 2%" * DeathNote comic http://www.7image.ru/pics/0910/6745183.jpg (left to right) //English translation// (they even don't suspect...) Spike: What are you going, Roger? hehehe R: I'll drink bighead and make him tell his name. - R: (idiots!) people: You're Kira! - not, you're Kira! R: Hey, L... Let me guess in your passport theresn't a letter F, right? L: Hm... Now I'm sure you're Kira by 0,07%! - B: I did what you say me... I saw his name... R: Don't make me wait, what's his name???? monster: YOU'RE SCUM, YOU KILLED HER!!!! R: Give me notebook or I'll beat you by broom!!! ?: HEY, SO YOU'RE KIRA!!! - R: Erhh noo... it's mistake! R: HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! YOU'RE ALL IDIOTS!!!! I'LL DESTROY YOU!!! C: so that's it... STOP, KIRA!!! R: While I got note, YOU NEVER WIN!!!! ...what is your name... erh... damn - R: MOTHER F-!!!! R: What a heck... - DROP HIM HELL AWAY!!!! aaahh help *** (Damn what's he doing again?..) - AAAH!!! I've slipped out!!!!! * - Hey man! Hurry up, you're not alone here!!! * - Okay, Rex, take trail!!! * - Reception, I see strange old, destroy him? * - Are you sure it's correct coordinates? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frans Posted September 13, 2010 Report Share Posted September 13, 2010 That Phleebhut tornado warning is the bomb! Too bad it sez Pestulon, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pcj Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 Pretty sure that weather picture is from one of the Spoof Offs (http://wiw.org/~jess/forum/viewtopic.php?t=3400). Unfortunately sq7.org is dead so it's impossible to verify. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted September 14, 2010 Author Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 Wow, thanks for link (Y) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted September 10, 2011 Author Report Share Posted September 10, 2011 SQ Lentas *** *** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frede Posted September 11, 2011 Report Share Posted September 11, 2011 I think I can say somewhat safely that I don't get it... :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted September 11, 2011 Author Report Share Posted September 11, 2011 Probably it's just my 'good English'. What moments didn't you get? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frede Posted September 11, 2011 Report Share Posted September 11, 2011 Oh, nothing to do with your English, man. I guess I just don't find 'em very funny. That's my loss, really. Make no mistake, Sledgy - it's nice to see someone being so active around Space Quest again :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted September 12, 2011 Author Report Share Posted September 12, 2011 Also it's template for new parodies! So you can create your own ones! :D As facepalm comics. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted September 17, 2011 Author Report Share Posted September 17, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted October 13, 2011 Author Report Share Posted October 13, 2011 Ooone twwooo, ooone!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted November 4, 2011 Author Report Share Posted November 4, 2011 Gary Ownes you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Collector Posted January 12, 2012 Report Share Posted January 12, 2012 Spambot? Anyway, it's "they want to give the list" not "they want to gift the list". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Collector Posted February 18, 2012 Report Share Posted February 18, 2012 Another spambot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted February 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 Paint works by severe Russian guy Evarube :P Generally it's SQ version of memes. "I'll break you, motherfucker, like bums" ETC *** by Andrey aka Andrew Kuznetzov "He looks at it as at shit..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted February 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 Comics about bear and hair (Evarube) Bear: SQ Inc is shit? Hair: no Bear: very well [put hair in the ass] (Sledgy) Another text to this strip. Bear: Do you want to see SQ2 VGA? Bear: ... [put hair in the ass] *** Bear: SQ Inc is shit? Hair: YES!!! Won't you put me in your ass??? Bear: ... [put hair in the ass] *** Bear: You saw The Dark Knight??? Hair: no.... [put hair in the ass] *** Bear: Do you want to learn what are assjokes? Hair: Yeah [put hair in the ass] -------------- Assjokes (jopoumor) is a little Russian SQ meme in the SQ Russian forum. SQ2 VGA has many of it. Examples: - poor hair in the beginning of the game - RW shows ass at the location near rope and ape - or RW shows 'fuck you' (O)o) - the Narrator dialogs with assjokes (in wrong and etc clicks) - the Hunter kills RW via his ass. In the original he just ties RW to a stick! (see proof-links below) - In the end Pinkunz killed the Hunter via the ass... and have a fun Proof-pic (labels are 'stick', 'rope') (see from 05:10) Another scary SQ2 VGA pic -> Deathscene Really we love all of the new SQ fangames. And SQ2 VGA. *** The general Russian fans opinions: - The worsest is SQ Inc. It's not SQ. Beatrice is a terrible b*tch. Son is mad shit. But anyway it's beautiful 3D work. - The best is VSB. Furkinz are nice :P) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sledgy Posted February 19, 2012 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 Typical assjoke Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frede Posted February 20, 2012 Report Share Posted February 20, 2012 Wow. Honestly, this is unbelievably unfunny. There, I said it. You've really outdone yourself. You've taken a joke I happen to like ("Hey, rabbit, do you have a problem with shit in your fur?") and turned it into... well, never mind; I'm speechless. Call me serious again - I just like to think I have a slightly more sophisticated sense of humour. Also, considering the fact I spent ages on the music I did for Chris, I'm frankly a bit insulted by the notion that SQInc is "shit". Nope, it's not my game, but still. Someone made this for you to play for free. You may not like it, but at least show some damn respect. If you don't know any other English words than "shit" that'll cover it, don't write it, cause you're bound to piss someone off. Even if it's supposed to be a "joke." Really, it's kinda bittersweet, cause obviously, I'm also glad you like VSB. But if this is representative of the humour among you guys, I'm sort of afraid you're digging the game for all the wrong reasons. Viscum's review didn't help matters much; I can tell you that I'm not homosexual, and the "kunz" in Furkunz is not meant to be read as slang for female genitalia. Oh, and by the way, this post isn't meant to reflect the opinions of Chris or Team VSB. It's all my personal opinion; I just can't bear this anymore. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datadog Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 Thanks, man. :P Sledgy, seeing as how you like to post your private opinions in public forums with colorful cartoons, I'll have to decline your offer to translate SQInc. On a slightly unrelated note, there are multiple links in this thread that are causing my anti-virus software to go crazy. At the moment, my computer's blocking several images being hosted on "jift.narod.ru/invis/". Sledgy's posts might be the cause for all the spam this thread keeps getting. Not that I'm suggesting we delete Sledgy's ENTIRE collection of pictures out of bitterness to save the forum from viruses and malware, but... no, wait. Actually, yeah. I totally am. So far, I'm not seeing a downside to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Collector Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 I have Ad Block set to delete that crap as much for safety reasons as well as to speed up the loading of the page (those Russian servers are slow as molasses) half a dozen images per post. I should probably just start ignoring this thread. They aren't funny, anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MusicallyInspired Posted February 21, 2012 Report Share Posted February 21, 2012 I've been ignoring it myself. Sledgy, enough with the pictures already. They're remarkably unfunny and don't represent Space Quest well at all. I'd hate for someone to come here trying to find what SQ is all about then finding these pictures and being completely misled. This thread is one of the most active ones, too, so it's likely people would think it's a "hot topic". I thought that you'd eventually just give up seeing that nobody has responded but you keep at it. I think it's safe to assume nobody here shares your sense of humour in this regard. This thread is turning into a spam fest and a spambot attractor. I'm locking it. Also, SQ Inc is fantastic as I've just started playing it. VSB is great too. Lots of great animation and good looking backgrounds there. Don't hate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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